Today I wanted to revisit a topic that I reference frequently in these blogs: mindfulness. I think that most people have heard of mindfulness, but many others look at me strangely when I bring it up. Mindfulness is definitely associated with meditation, and for good reason; some of the practices are exactly that. However, when people hear meditation, some think of a religious practice or hippies. Mindfulness is simply a specific focus on something happening in the present, and I promise it can be done regardless of your beliefs or the length of your hair.

Mindfulness is not new. In fact, it is a very old practice. However, modern research shows that there are a lot of benefits to practicing mindfulness. It has been shown to help people with ADHD to improve concentration and reduce the frequency and intensity of their emotional reactions. It has been shown to reduce levels of the stress hormone, cortisol, in our blood stream. For people who have experienced trauma and have an easily reactive fight or flight response, mindfulness is shown to help strengthen their ability to regulate themselves and calm their bodies. According to the Mayo Clinic, mindfulness** can lower:

Stress
Anxiety
Pain
Depression
Insomnia
High blood pressure
Symptoms of asthma and fibromyalgia
Feelings of burnout

It can improve**:

Attention
Sleep
(Interestingly) Control of diabetes

Mindfulness practice teaches us how to notice what is going on inside of us without judging whether it is good or bad. I’ve stated frequently that our emotions are neither good nor bad, they just are. Attempting to fight or suppress our feelings isn’t effective, and it tends to create all kinds of problems. When we practice mindfulness, we can learn to sit with our feelings and emotions, which can lead to acceptance. Counterintuitively, leaning into the emotions that one is trying to avoid is actually what helps relieve the distress that they feel.

I often describe mindfulness as an exercise for your brain. Though it is calming, the best effects of mindfulness come from regular practice, not just the temporary benefits of regulating oneself when we feel out of control. Just like strength training works over time with regular, repetitive actions, mindfulness is most helpful when done this way too.

Here’s the thing, it doesn’t have to be something that takes up a large portion of your day. In an article from the Cleveland Clinic, it is recommended* to start with daily 1-minute mindfulness practices. They suggest taking 5 slow deep breaths, while placing your attention on the movement of the breath (the air going in and out of your nose, the rise and fall of your shoulders, the expansion and contraction of your chest, or the movement of your belly). After you’ve done this 5 times, pause and then do 5 more breaths. That should take approximately a minute. The article also recommends a lot of different activities that can be done mindfully, but as I looked at the list, it was a series of hobbies. Whatever you do for enjoyment, just be present.

Other recommendations** for mindfulness practices:

Pay attention, using your senses (sight, hearing, touch, smell, taste)
Bring yourself fully into the present moment
Make an effort to accept yourself without judgment of good or bad
Scan your body slowly and methodically from head to toe or vice versa
Sit with your eyes closed and take note of what you feel in your body
Go for a walk while noticing the sensations you feel (the sun on your face, the smell of the air, the things you see, the feel of your feet touching and leaving the pavement, etc)

One last thing: you’re going to get distracted while you practice mindfulness. This is normal, and it happens. When you notice that your focus has drifted to a distracting noise or thought, just gently pull your attention back to what you want to focus on. I once heard that the people who are bad at mindfulness get the best impact from mindfulness. The act of bringing your attention back from the distraction, to the thing you have decided to focus on, is where we really flex our mindful muscles. The Cleveland Clinic article* put it perfectly, saying that sometimes you may feel like you’ve been so distracted that you weren’t actually being mindful. That’s ok–it’s all about the practice.

*https://health.clevelandclinic.org/what-is-mindfulness/

**https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/consumer-health/in-depth/mindfulness-exercises/art-20046356

The theme of this month continues to be stress. Two weeks ago I wrote about what stress is and how it affects the body. Last week the focus was on things that people can adjust in their lifestyle or habits that can have a positive effect on their ability to deal with the stress in their lives. This is helpful in the sense that it is an investment in your time or efforts that will reduce stress overall, however, those things are less helpful during the moment when the stuff hits the fan. Today I’d like to focus on immediate stress management techniques that people can do when they are stressed and overwhelmed.

1. Ground yourself. No, I don’t mean that you take your own phone and tv privileges away. When overwhelmed, people use words like spinning out of control, spiraling, or being in a tailspin. When this happens, we need to firmly plant ourselves in the present so that we can have a stable place to handle the chaos all around us.

My favorite grounding techniques involve the senses. Start by looking around you and taking note of 5 things that catch your eye. Notice these things and pay close attention to the details of them.
Next, stop and listen. It might help to close your eyes during this exercise as you try to identify 4 different sounds.
Touch is the next sense that we’re going to explore, but I recommend that you not use your hands. Our hands are very sensitive and this is usually how we explore touch sensations, but we have nerve endings all over our bodies. Feel for 3 different points of contact like the ground beneath your feet, the feel of your chair beneath you or against your back, the wrinkle in the knees of your pants, or even the slight weight of your shirt laying on your shoulders.
Next is the sense of smell. I don’t have a particularly strong sense of smell, so if I’m in a room for a few minutes, I probably don’t smell anything. The thing about this exercise, though, is that the benefits come from searching, not necessarily finding the sensation. Maybe you only smell one thing or nothing. Maybe earlier you were in a quiet room and could only hear the sound of your own breathing. That’s fine. Try to find 2 different smells.
Last is taste. I invite you to check your mouth for 1 flavor or a taste (by the way, even if a sight, sound, touch, smell, or taste is unpleasant, we can still explore them). You can also feel free to take a drink or bite a snack during this part of the exercise, just really pay attention to the sensations in your mouth, including texture.

Another grounding exercise is to have a snack that has a very strong flavor and put your full attention on it as you eat it. This could be a peppermint, something spicy, something especially sweet, or anything that has a particularly notable flavor. I think that something with complex flavors like salty-sweet could work as well. The point is to have something that draws your attention into the here and now.

2. Progressive muscle contraction and relaxation. For this exercise, we start at the feet and work our way up. Take your feet and squeeze them hard for 10 seconds, and then allow the muscles to relax. Put your full attention on the muscles when it is time to relax them and allow them to loosen until they are softer than they were before. Then repeat contracting the muscles again for another count of 10 and allow them to relax again. Then it is time to move your attention up to your legs. Squeeze and hold your leg muscles for a count of 10 and then relax them fully the same way that you did for your feet. Repeat this exercise as well. Move your way up through your body and repeat this exercise with your stomach, lower back, shoulders, arms and hands, and finally with your neck and face. By the time you are done, your body should feel more relaxed than it was previously.

There is a similar exercise that I especially recommend to kids that get overwhelmed and start to act aggressively. I call it the “break glass in case of emergency” exercise. For this exercise, stand up and squeeze every muscle in your body as strong and tight as you can manage while you hold your breath for a full 10 seconds. After 10 seconds, breathe normal for about half a minute and then repeat again. This activity uses a bunch of energy in a short amount of time, and it can help people who feel like they are about to lose it.

3. Breathing exercises. Sometimes people roll their eyes at me when I suggest breathing exercises, but they definitely work. Slowing down our breathing slows down our body and calms our mind.

Just breathe deep and slow. Try to concentrate on slowly breathing in with your belly, and breathe in until your belly won’t extend out any further. Then breathe out, and see if you can exhale longer than you inhaled.
4 square breathing. Imagine a box in front of you or use the visual of a window or picture frame. Let your eyes travel up the left side of the square as you breathe in for 4 seconds, move your eyes from left to right on the top of the square as you hold your breath for 4 seconds, work your way down the right side of the square as you breathe out for 4 seconds, and then move from right to left on the bottom of the square as you hold for 4 seconds without any air. Then repeat this exercise until you have traveled the square 5 different times. When you complete this exercise, allow your breathing to return to normal.
Finger tracing breathing. Hold out one hand in front of you. Use the index finger on your other hand to slowly start tracing your hand starting at the thumb-side of your wrist. As you slowly travel from your wrist to the tip of your thumb breathe in. Pause at the top of your thumb briefly then slowly travel to the base of your thumb and index finger, breathing out the whole time. Then slowly travel up your index finger as you breathe in again, and breathe out as you slowly travel down the other side of your index finger. Repeat this with your middle, ring, and pinky fingers. Feel free to repeat the exercise a few more times or allow your breathing to return to normal.

These techniques won’t take away your stress, I’m sorry to say, but they will help you in the moment to not feel lost in overwhelming thoughts and emotions. The idea behind these exercises is to get people back to the point that they can think again. When we can think, we can find solutions.